In the movie Evan Almighty, there is a scene where Evan Baxter (Steve Carell) is talking with God (Morgan Freeman). God told Evan that he will be building an Ark to house the animals from a flood. Evan is less than excited about it. He proceeds to tell God how he is not the man for the job, he has other things to do and how this project does not line up with his schedule. Instantly, God starts laughing. Evan goes on to strongly emphasize; "this is not in my plans!" Upon hearing this, God erupts into even further laughter. Evan just stares at him with a look of "why are you laughing?"
The next words God tells Evan are powerful; "Your plans? Yeah that's a funny one."
People want to believe they are in control of their plans. We feel confident and on purpose when we work that plan and progress on it. But does that really qualify as being in control?
Recently, over lunch, a good friend of mine reminded me of that movie scene and how life is often like that.
Like Evan, I too was given something which was not part of my plans. It came out of left field, no signs, no warnings whatsoever. My friend, mentor, sound board and prayer partner when things got tough, she edited most of my writings for the last two and a half years, had a life altering accident and lost her life. Truly a tragedy. One that her family and I are still working through. Losing Gina prematurely was not in any of our plans and some of us are still speechless.
Rarely, if ever, are there answers to why things like this happen, especially when they seem so devastating. Was it God's plan? Was it just an accident God allowed to happen? One day, maybe we'll know, but for now, in this life, all of us will have to deal with tragedies. Responsibilities and obligations never not stop for the living.
More than likely, our best, well intended plans will have to be altered. That doesn't make them wrong, it means we need to be able to change, with the change that is thrown to us. Each of us set our plans into motion with the most accurate information we have at the time. Then, down the road, with more information the necessary changes can be made, ensuring the desired outcome we want.
Many good, caring, loving people have had things happen to them that they did not deserve or they were not part of their plans. Yet at the end of the day, the best thing we can do is get back up, dust ourselves off and allow ourselves to deal and heal. Then, start walking again. It's a process that takes time and we need to be patient with our self. No, it won't be easy, no one ever said it would.
Tragedies are not road blocks, they're detours. I had to remind myself of this a few times over the last several months. We may walk differently after the tragedy and that's OK. The point is to start walking again. Don't let devastation hold you back from doing what you know, needs to be done.
Set backs are 90% internal and 10% external. They are a mental battle. At the end of the day, I am reminded that losing someone you love is merely an indicator that your course has changed. Moving forward is the only option for me and I hope it is for you, as well.
Have a great weekend everyone, be blessed.
(In memory of an amazing friend and woman, Gina Barrett. I promise to finish what we started, love and miss you mom)
Scott, loss really started for me when I lost my father at the age of 25. Dad was 62, a wonderful man and father. Although I was a Christian it took me 5 years to get past the anger of loosing him. I know that I will see him again and I often talk to him, I guess it is my way of really figuring out situations in my life since he and I always discussed everything. I have found that we have different seasons in our life, some long some short. The plans we make are often changed by growing or just plain circumstances beyond our control. We start off with these huge goals, ideals and dreams and often they are not realized. God never promised that we would have an easy life, or that things would always be good. He only promised to be there with us and to help us walk through the difficult times. I believe that just when we think we have everything under control, God shows us that we are not in control, but that he holds our lives in his hands. Does that mean that he tests or tempts us? NO!!! It means that he allows us to choose, and sometimes our choices are not part of his plan but our selfish desires. You know what I have went through in my life, yet with almost everything I still remind myself that everything I go through is a direct result of the decisions I have made. Loosing your mother is so difficult, and it will take time to heal from the pain. Do not let anyone tell you that you have to get through this in any timeframe. Loss is real, and it shows that you are a caring and compassionate person with the ability to love. We cannot understand why we loose the ones we love, especially when unexpected. But I can tell you that my fathers death secured his eternity in Heaven; and that if my sister had not passed her son would have been lost. Her passing gave my nephew a second chance at life, it literally saved his life. Remember, even as hard as this is, we are to rejoice in all things; good and bad. I know someday you will understand why God chose to take Gina home early; her sacrifice may be the salvation for someone else. Just a thought! Love ya, Tami
ReplyDeleteThanks, Tami. I appreciate your feed back and feel a similar pain you did, with your dad. You are an incredible lady and I admire your strength, determination and ability to encourage others. Your awesome! ~ Scott
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