Making out a list, re affirming what you do want in a spouse and becoming aware of what you really, truly want. Those are key aspects to attracting the perfect mate.
This week we are going to discuss some unhealthy beliefs and unrealistic expectations you may have. Truth be know, you may not even be aware you have these and like I mentioned earlier, we can not fix what we do not know is broken.
Our society (culture) has a way of programming us. Commercials on TV, billboards we drive by, signs, advertising…it’s everywhere. Through this blast bombardment of images and ideas, shapes our sense of what is important. Unfortunately this is not always for the betterment of us as people.
We do need to be aware of this. A large part of the way you think, act and what you believe is a direct result of your constant environment. So do a check up on yourself. Up until this point, has your environment been conducive to attracting the kind of person you have written down on your list?
Next, you need to understand that if you have not dealt with any hurts, heartaches, disappointments, bitterness or anger from a past relationship, you are not ready for Mr. or Ms. Right. I know this may sound harsh and unpopular, but consider a few things.
Any and all hurts of the past that have not been completely extinguished (dealt with properly) you are carrying around with you. This means that if the right person did come along, you then will be sharing those hurts with them. Yes, you may bring love, joy and excitement into the relationship but you are also bringing unnecessary baggage and some of it, will probably be destructive to your new someone.
Whatever is impressed upon you must be expressed. This means, what has happened to you, what you have experienced, felt and lived, must be shown through you. It will come out through your actions, words, frustration, temperament; it’s all expressed from within. More times then not, you will be completely unaware you’re even doing it.
Don’t down play this it is a powerful piece of the equation. Just because you can’t see it or feel it, doesn’t mean it’s not at work. Often, this is where counseling comes into play. Helping you sort through those unseen things can have magic in it.
Unfortunately, some people see counseling as a negative. Maybe their pride, ego or even stubbornness won’t allow it. I choose to see it as a sign of strength and maturity. Admitting you can’t do something alone and need some guidance or help is a powerful step in growing as an individual and it unlocks the doors to inner freedom.
Next week, we will continue on with unhealthy beliefs and unrealistic expectations.
Have a great Friday everyone, be blessed.
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