Part 2 of 7 on the Mindset of Success

Last week I challenged you to define what success means to you.  Did you do that?  Do you have it written down?  If you really want to make the most of this 7-part series, you will need to have done it so that the material I am sharing with you will have maximum impact on you and what you believe about success.

“Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.”  I have heard this phrase coined many times.  But what does it mean?  Most people think success is simply having a lot of nice, neat, fancy things.  That is what our society would have you believe.  Just get the material things and you will be successful.  Well, I am going to strongly disagree with society for many reasons, but let’s dig into this deeper.

While there is a lot of truth that most successful people do make an above-average income, basing success on income alone is very shallow.  Basing one’s success on the amount of material things they have is being narrow minded.  I say this because I have been around many people who have financed everything they have ever bought and truth be known, they actually owned nothing.  Yet on the outside, they looked very successful.  On the inside though, their lives were a mess.

I have also met and spent time around people who have invested hundreds, if not thousands of hours into themselves in education and personal development and their business.  These types of people look a lot different than most.  The ongoing intense investment into themselves is almost hard to believe for some and not worth it for most.  These people have not focused on the getting or accumulating of things, rather they have focused on becoming someone of great value when it comes to their craft.

I have heard Jim Rohn say, “By becoming a better you, you, will bring more to the relationship and that will make you more valuable.”  The first time I heard this, it changed my thinking.  You mean I have to work on “me”?  That was a paradigm change for me…but I got it, it made sense to me.  Shortly after this mini-revelation, I began to realize that truly successful people are valuable and if I will work on becoming more valuable, then I am working my way to success.  It was another one of those “ahh haa” moments for me.

So maybe being successful is not about getting all the cool stuff.  Maybe there is more.  Maybe it is more about who we become rather than what we get.  Does that mean the becoming comes first and the getting comes last?  Perhaps, but what exactly does the becoming part mean to me?  What do I have to do, what does that entail and what does that look like?

Everywhere I look, more and more people, places and ideas seem to be claiming that simply making a lot of money will bring happiness to your life.  There are business models that promote this.  Books, seminars, newspaper ads and internet sites all say the same thing:  “Are you tired of not making the kind of money you want or deserve?  Well then do I have something for you.”  Does this sound familiar to anyone? 

Every time I see or hear this type of phrase, inside I cringe.  Why? Because once again people are focusing on what they can get, not on what they can become.  Ideas like these are pushing money as the main reason to do something, and money should never be the main thing.  Yes, we all need money to live, eat and survive, but working only for money seems to be a very shallow way to go through life.  Life has so much more to offer than just working to make money.  Yes, for some, money may be a motivator, but by a long shot, those individuals are only a tiny segment of the overall population. 

Working at something you love, something you enjoy, something that you contribute value to and are passionate about, sounds like a much better way to go through life.  In fact, I would be willing to bet any amount of money that the mass majority of people would be far more driven, inspired and motivated by their passion than money.  One person with passion is far more powerful than someone who is simply driven by money. 

So is it passion that moves us toward success?  Perhaps…find out more next week when we go into part 3 in The Mindset of Success.

Have a great Friday everyone, be blessed.

Part 1 of 7 The Mindset of Success

In this 7-part series, I am going to give you some things to think about, things you need to answer and know for yourself.  No, this is not going to be a series on how to become successful.  Not only is it not for me to share with you, it is not what this is all about.  This is all about you and what you perceive success to be.

Ask yourself this question: what is success to me?  Define your answer and then write it down in a very clear and specific measure.  There is not a right or wrong for this exercise, there is only your answer and your own understanding of the term itself.

The word success is thrown around so often today in our culture, I think all of us have become a little numb to it.  It does not seem to have the impact it once did.  Becoming successful is something only a few people achieve and it is not because there is only room for a select few.  What are some of the words you would use to describe success?  Write those down and write down any thoughts that follow.  You may be surprised what stirs up inside you while doing this.

I think the most common visual picture that Americans associate with success is having an abundance of things.  Cars, homes, boats and RV’s, maybe even fine jewelry, or taking extravagant vacations.  If this were actually true, does that mean everyone who has things like this is successful?  What about the person who works at a job 40 -50 hrs a week, makes 150k a year and chooses to finance everything he owns.  Thus on the outside, he might look like a millionaire, but is he?  Sure he makes an above average income, but is he really successful?  If the lottery winner only had to buy the winning lottery ticket worth 2 million dollars, does that make him or her successful?

You will answer these questions I just posed by the way you think and what you believe to be true.  Interestingly enough, not everyone will answer these questions the same, simply because one’s perception and belief of what success is, will be different.  Sure, on the outside, having all those nice things sounds fantastic and perhaps to an extent, it is.  To a degree, life can be more pleasant when you have things to share and enjoy with others.  But by owning those things, are you automatically successful? 

If so, what about the business owner who has been in business for many years, does very well, employs dozens or hundreds of people, but chooses to live a very frugal lifestyle?  Is he then not a success because he chooses to not “show” everyone how much money he has by the things he owns?  I personally know several individuals just like this.  They have considerably more money than anyone would ever know, yet drive modest cars and live in an older, modest home.  Are they a success?

What about those people who do not make an above-average income and do not have a lot of material possessions, but are leaders, achievers and highly regarded at their craft or business?  Are they a model of success?  This question of success demands to be answered in its entirety.

This takes us back to the start again:  What is success to you?  If you have not answered this question yet for yourself, in written detail, the rest of what I am going to share with you over the next 6 weeks will probably not have the awakening on you that you need, and I fear you may miss the bigger picture. 

I have heard it said and have read that: success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.

A worthy ideal?  That’s different because from what I see, that is not what most people call success.  Maybe we better dig a little deeper into this next week as this may not be crystal clear yet.

Have a great weekend everyone, clarify what success is for your self, and be blessed.

7 Part Series on the Mind set of Success... Coming Your Way

So many times I have come across people who think success is about getting and having money and things.  The truth is that nothing could be further from the truth.

On these warm summer afternoons, I often make time in my schedule to go on bicycle rides.  It is great exercise and I am able to have a little “me” time.  During these rides, it is fairly common that my mind goes to a place of deep thought on deep subjects, everything from relationships to creative business ideas.

The other day I could not stop thinking about the mindset of success and all it entails.  For 7 miles on that 11 mile ride, all I could think about was the way in which people view and think about success.  How do they achieve it?  Why is it that only a few people out of the masses seem to have it?  What are the common denominators for success?  All of these questions began to consume me.

Society tends to label success by what you drive, wear and what you live in.  Meaning: how big and fancy those things are.  Personally, I don’t drive a $75,000.00 car that I paid cash for and I don’t live in a 5000 sq ft home.  My bank account does not have 7 digits in it nor does it have 6 digits in it.  But the real truth to success is not in what you have, it is about what you become.

Those I just mentioned are simply things you can acquire being successful, they should not define your success.  If this were not true, does that mean a business owner who makes a million dollars a year and has chosen to keep most of his money, or even give it away anonymously and does not live a lavish lifestyle, is not successful?

Success is not having one, two or three million dollars, nor is it owning several homes.  It is not about wearing a Rolex watch on your wrist nor is it about taking 3-4 expensive vacations a year to exotic locations.  If this were the case, then you could classify every large lottery winner a success.  No, lottery winners revolve around luck, and that is not what success is.

In large, people ‘become’ long before they ever ‘get’.  They do certain activities in a certain way longer and more frequently than others, giving them different results than the masses.  Chances are great they have faced many challenges and struggles along the way and even when things got real tough, they never gave up or changed course.  Why?  Because they developed daily, weekly and monthly habits that have yielded them a higher rate of return than others.

I cannot teach you or anyone else how to make a million dollars a year.  Why?  Because I have not done that yet, therefore how could I teach it?  You and I can only give someone else what we possess.  Oh sure, we can give others our opinions on matters, but most times our opinions are truly not our own, they are someone else’s that we have adopted.  But that topic is for another time.

Over the next seven weeks I am going to share with you some of the lies about success that society in general would have you believe.  There is a profound difference in just making a lot of money and in being successful.  Passion, achievement, fulfillment and ambition are all things I will be covering in this 7-part series.

If you believe success is all about having an abundance of money, you are in for a huge wake-up call.  If you believe having a lot of money will make you happy or fulfilled in your life, you’re mistaken and have bought into someone else’s lie. 

This series will be enlightening for most and an awakening for others.  By the way, I strongly encourage everyone who wants to, to become successful.  But before you do, wouldn’t you like to know what success really is?  After you read this series, you may see things a little differently.

Have a great Friday everyone, be blessed.

Is Your Image Working for you?

When I was in my 20’s, I never stopped to think about how I was portraying myself to others.  My words, my actions, how I dressed or even how I carried myself.  I think that is fairly common with most young people though, they are too caught up in themselves.  I know I was.

But later in life I learned that everywhere I go I am portraying an image to other people.  Meaning, I am giving others reasons to make an assessment of me based on my behavior, and from that, they are creating a belief in their own mind of who I am.  Now I don’t focus a lot of energy on this matter, but I am very aware of it and how it plays a part in my life.

Spending the last eight and a half years in the mortgage industry, I wanted to give off a professional image.  I wanted people to take me serious and know that I was indeed a professional at my craft.  So I dressed the part every day to match the image I wanted to portray.  I was even careful how I looked if I went somewhere on the weekends.  If I came across a potential client while out in public, I did not want their first impression of me to be a bad one.  I wanted to keep my image up because I am a believer that our image is important.

A couple of years ago, I was having lunch at one of my favorite places when I came across an old friend I had not seen in a while.  He was a real estate agent and we started up a conversation.  At the same time I asked him how his business was doing, I could not help but notice the ragged T-shirt and worn cargo shorts he was wearing.

He told me business was extremely slow and that he was looking at getting out of real estate.  I asked him if he was working today or did he have the day off.  His answer shocked me!  “No, I am working today, in fact I just came from showing a property.”  “In those clothes?” I asked him.  “Yeah,” he said.  “I don’t have to look good, I just have to make the sale.”

Every day, no matter what we are doing, we are portraying an image to those around us.  Even if we wanted to turn this part of us off, we could not.  Our minds take an account of everything we see and experience and from there, that information is logged into our memory banks and put onto an audio / video file.  My friend the real estate agent totally missed the point that image is important.

Yes, I do have times where I completely dress down as if I were going to the lake.  I love those days.  But I am also aware that with this style, I am still creating an image.  This is not a bad thing, but it is something that we need to be aware of.

If you want to be taken serious, then you need to dress serious.  If you want people to know you as an expert in your field, then you need to look like the expert in your field.  If your current image is not how you want people to see you, then start today and change it.  This is not about impressing anyone or making a statement that says “hey look at me”, this about you, your life, your success and how you want people to think of you.

Right now, today, what is your image?  You are emanating one whether you realize it or not.  You might as well create one that works for you rather than against you.

Have a great weekend and Fourth of July everyone, be blessed.